Nurturing the Self: The Differences Between Self-Soothing, Self-Care, and Self-Love
Through the years of spending time with my inner self and exploring what truly nurtures me, I have come to recognize the important distinctions between self-soothing, self-care, and self-love. These concepts each have their own unique role in our overall well-being and growth.
Self-Soothing: In moments of vulnerability, it's easy to turn to quick fixes that offer a temporary sense of comfort. For me, this might have meant scrolling through social media or seeking comfort through conversations with friends. These actions may provide a brief escape from discomfort or anxiety, but they don’t offer lasting healing. Self-soothing is about momentary relief rather than deep nourishment. It’s a way of numbing the emotions instead of confronting them.
Self-Care: On the other hand, self-care involves taking intentional actions to support our physical, mental, and emotional well-being. It's about consciously making choices that help us maintain balance and vitality. This could be something as simple as getting a massage, indulging in a relaxing bath, or taking time to rest. Self-care nourishes the body and mind, and it’s often about replenishing what has been drained by life’s demands. It’s essential, but it can be more about maintaining than truly transforming.
Self-Love: What I’ve come to understand as self-love is much deeper, more expansive, and more consistent than both self-soothing and self-care. It’s a practice of commitment to oneself—not just in the moments of need, but every day. Self-love means nurturing yourself with care, patience, and compassion, long-term. It’s not just about doing things that feel good in the moment, but about building a relationship with yourself that is grounded in respect, kindness, and growth.
For me, one of the most beautiful expressions of self-love has been through the practice of yoga. There are days when I step onto the mat and feel a deep connection with my body, a feeling that can only be described as nurturing. In certain postures, I experience a deep sense of being held—like a warm embrace—an invitation to soften and let go. They are rooted in a deeper form of care that honors my body in its full, unique expression.
In yoga, when I hold a pose and feel the gentle stretching, I sense a quiet acknowledgment of my body’s needs. It’s a way of hugging myself, offering compassion and love through each breath. This restorative practice is a reminder that I am deserving of care, not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually.
Self-Love as a Lifestyle: But self-love isn’t just confined to the yoga mat. It’s in the small choices I make every day. It’s going for a walk alone in nature, where I can clear my mind and feel connected to the earth. It’s preparing a nourishing meal that fuels my body, instead of reaching for something quick or mindlessly eating. It’s in the commitment to listening to my body, honoring my emotions, and setting boundaries that protect my peace.
Self-love is a daily practice. It’s about cultivating habits that reinforce my worth, without the need for external validation or temporary comfort. It’s about creating space for myself, and letting my actions be a reflection of the love I have for who I am, even in my imperfections.